You went out a few times and then suddenly … they stop answering your texts.
You are heatedly messaging a few times, make plans for a date and then BAM – they never gets back to you.
You have an amazing first date and you’re so sure that a second date is on the way and then … you never hear from them again.
What the heck?
This type of behavior, otherwise known as “ghosting,” is frustrating and hurtful.
Define Ghosting
If you’re unfamiliar with this term, it’s time you got yourself acquainted.
- Ghosting (v): purposefully avoiding and ignoring someone you previously were communicating with; abruptly cutting off communication with a potential romantic partner without explanation.
It’s a maddening dating behavior single men and women deal with on a regular basis (yes, it happens to girls and guys alike). People are left to wonder what happened and why someone who appeared so interested or emotionally invested would disappear into thin air without a trace. While I can’t guarantee you a definite answer because each situation is so unique, here are some solid reasons your date ghosted you.
1. They Picked Someone Else
He may have been messaging and dating many women. She might have had hot list with more than one name on it. This is the reality of dating in the new millennium. There are many sites to meet new people, as well as many ways to reconnect with former flames via social media. Your date may have just started to really take off with another person they were dating. It has no reflection on you; they just may have clicked very much with this person, even though they did enjoy your company.
The reality is that telling you this wouldn’t make the situation any different. Instead, they just backed out quietly and quickly. It probably would have been better to just tell you, but they didn’t want to hurt your feelings so they took the easy way out. They ghosted.
2. They Got Back With The Ex
He says he’s divorced. Is he? Her separation may not be as separate as she was letting on. They might be having second thoughts about leaving their former flame. Telling you this is mortifying and uncomfortable for them, and so they just…don’t. Honestly, if this is the reason your date ghosted you, be glad they did. Getting involved with them any further would have been heartbreaking.
3. They Wanted To Have Sex & You Didn’t
They didn’t tell you he met you with the goal of simply “getting some,” but that was the end goal, and it wasn’t achieved. If they were to actually tell you that, you would call them a loser or a jerk (or worse). They don’t care and they don’t want to hear your feedback, so they ghost.
Again, good riddance.
4. They’re Not Ready To Date
Maybe they just broke up with someone. Maybe their divorce was just finalized. Maybe they haven’t been on a date in a while. Your date may have ghosted you because they went out in the dating pool and realized they’re not really ready. They’re backing out because they’re realizing they’re in over their head.
5. They’re Not Ready For Commitment
Your date really likes you, but you’re ready to dive in and be committed and they’re well, either just looking to date or looking to have fun. Rather than have that uncomfortable conversation, they’re ducking out without a trace.
7. They Heard Something They Didn’t Like
It may have been something innocent you said or did that triggered a “no” response. So now, they’re going to be a big baby and back out without giving you a reason.
Don’t feel like you’re to blame. Unless you were blatantly rude, mean or crazy, the two of you probably aren’t compatible anyway. Trust me, you want a date who can communicate in a mature way, not someone who will vanish without a trace the moment things get messy. If your date ghosted you, be happy you dodged that baby before your feelings got any stronger!
You may also be interested in Cleanse Yourself Of Bad Dating Habits In The New Year
